Saturday, 14 March 2015

Selfie and Twerking Added To Dictionary…Hope is Removed

Selfies are pretty annoying. Whoever invented the selfie needs to take a good look at themselves. I wanted to be a selfie-photographer, but I just couldn’t picture myself doing it.

Your dog is your best friend. Lock your dog and your boyfriend in the kitchen for three hours and see which one is glad to see you when you get home.

Her boyfriend asked her for some sexy photos. She was very upset to find out he didn’t want them of her.

She stinks so bad that even the tide won’t take her out. She’s got a face like a blind joiners thumb and an attitude to match.
A radical-Muslim walks into a bar…….boom. 

I called her self-centered. She nearly fell off her throne. She’s so racist she won’t even get a tan.
These ladies put an energy saving bulb in their fridge. Fat girls do try harder…just not in the gym. What do obese people do in the summer?…stink.

She said “The People Don't Elect U.S. Presidents, God Does.” Or was that Sarah Palin? If god elects people, then why do we bother voting at all?

This is the same Santa that was arrested for handing a woman her shirt. He was in her wardrobe at the time.

 If you want to thrill the guys. Take a shot of you without showing your face, show your messy bedroom and get your kid in the shot. Win!

 This kid in the other car is cool.

I’m calling my new band, “Missing Cat.” You may have seen my posters.

 Does my butt look big in this?
Not in the distance it doesn't.

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